The Calm before the Storm

I have been mostly silent on social media regarding the upcoming election, but on the eve of a day that holds so much emotion, turmoil, and anxiety for many, I wanted to gather my thoughts in a good old-fashioned blog. I rarely do this anymore, but somehow, I could still recognize the signs that a blog post was imminent. It usually starts as a thought “hmm, maybe I should write something about this.”  This is followed by an immediate dismissal of said thought… “No, I don’t want to do that. No one cares what I think. I don’t have time…etc.”.  Then the thought comes back, sporadically at first, but then again and again, with greater frequency and intensity, nagging at me until I relent. When I go back and look at past blogs where this has been the case, I often realize in hindsight why I wrote it. Only then can I see the lesson that I could not see when I was writing it.  Because of that, I’ve realized two things about blogs like this, (1) It’s more for me than for whoever is reading it and (2) The nagging thoughts bear a striking resemblance to the very specific and familiar way the Holy Spirit nags me to do all sorts of things I don’t want to do. Soooo although I have not wanted to do this, I’m going to do it. Deep breath. Don’t worry, this will not be an endorsement of anyone, nor will it be an appeal to people regarding who I think they should vote for or against.

 

Every election season since I can remember has felt like the most divisive, and (we’ve been told) “most important in our lifetime”.  If I’m honest, I kind of think it has been true. Each time has been more divisive than the previous, and each time the stakes do seem higher than ever. What is also self-evidently true that our political climate and culture is evolving, or perhaps more accurately, devolving into something many do not recognize. Maybe this is a result of getting older, but from where I stand, it seems like rhetoric, divisiveness, scary scenarios and world events are collectively ramping up in intensity and temperature with each passing election cycle. A healthy self-governed country needs informed citizens who can engage in robust, open debate of ideas and issues. Unfortunately our loss of trust in institutions and commonly accepted information sources has combined with increased balkanization and intolerance for the opinions of others, making civil discourse an endangered species. This has served to guarantee further divisiveness and toxicity, which is becoming a feedback loop that just makes us more cynical, insular, miserable, and divided. We all know families, marriages and friendships that have been sacrificed at this alter of political tribalism. Because of all this some people have become apathetic, others more silent, and others defiantly become more vitriolic. None of this is a revelation to anyone. We all feel it, we all experience it, and I think we all hate it. (Can we at least all unite around that?)  

 

I have heard and read many comments across the political spectrum about the fears people have about this election. Not just about who wins, but also about how the country and the candidates will respond to who wins. I share those fears. But thankfully I have hope that is greater than my fears and have tried to put politics in its rightful place on the “priority list” of my life. If you have known me for more 10 or more years, you will likely note (and hopefully had already noticed) this is a huge change for me. (Sidebar the way God continues to change me, and my heart is unexplainable and amazing). A key benefit of putting politics into the right perspective and priority in my life is that I can go into the election day with much less anxiety and stress than I would have had otherwise. Another benefit is that I can see every other person going to cast their votes as a human being with worth and value that is not conditional to how they vote. This has brought me peace and joy during a time where I would previously have had the opposite. So while I won’t make an appeal to you of who to vote for, I will make an appeal to you to put politics in its rightful place in your life, both for your benefit and for the benefit of those you care most about. One day, we will be at the end of our lives, and I am certain in those last moments, the people in your life will matter more to you than who you and they voted for. I believe most people, both regular voters and politicians, have good intentions behind their votes/policies. I don’t think most people are really against other groups of people, want to destroy the country, are pro-harm, pro-death, pro-war, pro-poverty, pro-environmental destruction, etc. While some people are just evil, and malevolent forces may be at work behind the scenes, I do not think the average voter is in that camp. Most believe their views/candidate/party of choice are what is right, moral, just, best for the country, etc.  I am choosing to extend the assumption of good will to those with whom I disagree. With the children we love watching us, we can set a better example than hate, name calling, canceling, vilifying and disparaging each other. Being hateful, even when standing up against hate, is corrosive and serves to multiply hate. Hate never overcomes hate. (Romans 12:17-18) More than how we vote, how we treat others is the true evidence of virtue. Kindness, love, mercy and grace are most important, when extended to people for whom it is hard to do so. Anyone can be kind, loving, merciful and graceful to those we like and agree with. But can you love the person who stands against the thing(s) you care the most about? Can you be kind to the person who voted for someone you find reprehensible? While each side likes to claim Jesus would be on their team (I have opinions about that too), I think what we should focus on is that Jesus taught the radical idea of love your enemies. (Please don’t consider people on the other side the aisle to be your enemies, that’s not what I am saying!). He taught it is not enough to love only those it is easy to love. 

Candidly, I know I have done my part to contribute to the toxic environment we are in. I have been divisive, partisan, unkind…all the things. I have a lot of regret about that and I have tried to correct those things over the years. I am a work-in-progress and like our beloved freeways in DFW, I’m sort of perpetually “under construction”. With that in mind, this is what I am trying to do this year:

·      Hold true to my values and vote the way my conscience leads me

·      Love others no matter who they voted for

·      Have (offline) thoughtful civil discourse with anyone who is able to do so and wants to do so

·      Accept the results of the election 

·      Reject fear, cynicism, tribalism, hate, despair, arrogance or any other type of reaction we would label as “poor sportsmanship” if we saw it a sporting event 

·      Have hope no matter the results (There are so many unexpected byproducts of faith, but I think peace in uncertainty is one of the best ones.10 out of 10 recommend).

·      Give grace to others 

·      Accept that some people will hate me, judge me, be unkind to me, make assumptions about me that are not true…just because of my political views, but I will not let that change me  

 

I hope this has given even one person something helpful, but even if it has not, I know this….future me will definitely mine this blog for gold, finding the lessons I can’t yet see…I look forward to that.

 

I’ll close with this passage from Colossians 3 that I just love. 

¹² Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. ¹³ Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. ¹⁴ Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. ¹⁵ And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.

¹⁶ Let the message about Christ, in all its richness, fill your lives. Teach and counsel each other with all the wisdom he gives. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts.¹⁷ And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.

p.s. if you want to know more about Jesus, let me know

 Another Day to Reflect 1.20.2021

In 2008, I wrote a "blog" on facebook notes to articulate some of my thoughts about Obama's inauguration. (https://www.facebook.com/notes/770135083534400/). After what felt like the most divisive election of our lives (little did I know), I reflected on the historic day, the change in power, the imagery of the day, the strength of our country, our need for unity and the role the losing side plays in that, the adorable family that would occupy the White House, the clear impact all of it was having on friends of mine on the other side, gratitude to the service of the outgoing first family, and my promise to give the new administration the fairness in my scrutiny and assessment that I felt his predecessor never received. 

As I watched today's inauguration, I am struck by the differences to that day. The facemasks, the distancing, the scant crowd, the empty mall are all things that in and of themselves profoundly change the aesthetic and the atmosphere of this ceremony. But none of those things struck me as alien as the absence of the outgoing President and First Lady. His absence loomed larger than perhaps even his presence would have. The image of the Bushes and Obamas walking down to the helicopter together are burned into my memory from 2008. I now realize that image is not just tradition, but a comfort to the nation in transition. Today were all robbed of that. The events of the last few weeks have had a profound impact on me (as they likely have on all of us). I can't help but imagine how much better everything would be, had our leader done the right thing (conceded with dignity) rather than pursue the delusion that there was still a path to victory when all legal options had been exhausted. Today, more than just loss of an election, I feel a sort of grief and a sense of having been betrayed. As someone who supported and defended him for so long, this feels like a personal blow. No one person is bigger than our laws, our constitution, and our democratic process. Even with the mortal wound that he has given to his party and his followers in the last few weeks, I'm still shocked and disappointed he choose to break all decorum and tradition by snubbing the inauguration. But nothing is more important to him than his ego it seems. 

Still, as I watched the new president take his oath and give his speech, I have determined myself to be hopeful. I did not support him or vote for him. and I know that I will not agree with many/most of his policies, but here is what I hope for:

- The president sees that his greatest chance at going down in history as a great president is to focus on unity and healing. I have heard these words said, but the actions that will make them a reality will come at a price.  It will come at the expense of some of the desires of the most passionate and outspoken wing/base of his party.  It will require the restraint of a true patriot to put the good of the country over partisan agendas. And it will take the goodwill of those on both sides.  Biden is uniquely positioned to care very little about his political future, and put what is best for the country ahead of his ambitions (see Gerald Ford).

- The Bipartisan legislative process makes a comeback. Gridlock has made executive orders the preferred, easy path for presidents to enact their policies for far too long. But this over-reliance means one president can, with a stroke of a pen, undo much of the policies of his predecessor.  Gridlock has a place sometimes, but both sides need to remember that they are there to work together to make laws that benefit the country. I hope the president, who served so long in the Senate, will be committed to restoring that duty back to his rightful place and resist the temptation to govern through executive order as frequently as recent predecessors.

- As we continue to digest the horror of the capital siege,  I hope we do not overcorrect to the point of forfeiting our liberties. While I despise the misinformation of conspiracy theories, I despise even more censorship. We must resist the urge to "fix" the problem by restricting free speech. Instead, catch and punish the people who violate the law, and let that be the best deterrent to future insurrection.  That and speaking truth at every opportunity. We all have a role to play to champion reason and truth over conspiracy theories, lies and misinformation. As Thomas Jefferson said "Error of opinion can be tolerated where reason is left free to combat it." 

 - We stop dehumanizing those we disagree with. This has been happening for a long time, and it is tearing families and friendships apart. Lets re-learn how to disagree without hating each other. Stop canceling people (famous or not) that you don't agree with.  Stand up for free speech, even if you don't like it. Always speak truth, but with grace, not hate. 

Along with the things I'm hopeful for, there are many things I am thankful for.  I'm thankful for the bipartisan support of our former presidents and our former VP today. I'm thankful that they came together to show the power of our democracy is bigger than party. I'm thankful for the calls for unity and the grace I've seen many on the other side extend to me. I'm thankful that our constitutional republic has transferred power peacefully, albeit unconventionally, one again.  

President Biden is now my president, and he has my support, goodwill and prayers.  As I said with Obama, I promise to give him a fair chance and a fair assessment. I will continue stand up for my values and beliefs and will criticize things I think are wrong for our country as equally as I will praise the things I think are good for her.  I will respect him and his office, even when I disagree with him. I will not attack him personally, or let hate take root. This is the least I can do, as a citizen of the country my grandfather fought to defend. We are a nation that is divided and in many ways broken, and I can do very little to change that.  What I can do is not let it change me.  

The word spins madly around

The sky today was so dreary. Juxtaposed to the clear blue sky we remember that other 11th of September, it seems fitting.  As I made my way through the hustle and bustle of today, the sky kept reminding me, turning my attention for fleeting moments to the gnawing ache in my soul. This is the first year that it truly seems like history.  Like a time period I am completely separated from.  Its the first year I was surrounded by students who were either not yet born, or very young toddlers when the world changed.  Standing in that moment, 13 years ago, I couldn't comprehend a day would come when the world would not revolve around the September 11th.

But I always forget how quickly it comes back to me.  The sounds and sights still stop me dead in my tracks and still fill me with sadness. The stories still compel me. I see the footage and my mind turns my brain into a virtual time machine.  I can remember the chirping birds as I got out of my car and walked into work at American Honda Finance in Irving.  I remember Gary, someone whose name and face I would definitely not remember otherwise, telling me the news. I remember wondering why people keep attacking that building.  As the news unfolds, I remember everyone completely distracted and unable to work. Without smart phones and internet access at work, we relied on emails from family and friends "on the outside".  I couldn't understand where the buildings went.  Another coworker Melissa, who in an office that required strict professional attire, would often wear denim overall dresses with Winnie the pooh on them, told me there were over 200 unaccounted for planes (credible information she heard from her husband) and they are likely heading to targets around the country.  Another coworker mentioned a funny sounding name Osama Bin Ladin. I had not heard that name before.  I'm told he's on the most wanted list by the FBI, but I have no idea why.  Another coworker who liked to reel me into political debates about how horrible the president was, turns to me and says "maybe it is a good thing that we have Bush after all"  (A comment he would recant later).  I remember the boss coming out and talking about what was going on, we huddle around cubicle walls (picture office space, pretty much that exact thing).  He's from Boston, he has friends in the towers.  He breaks down.  I remember driving home that day.  At a stoplight I looked around and the cars around me seemed to be driven by zombies, the utter shock and disbelief on the faces of people who had couldn't  figure out what was going on.  Every church I pass has a makeshift sign "Vigil tonight"  "come pray with us tonight" "pray for america", etc.   The methodist church around the corner from me had a sign "prayer meeting at 8pm, all welcome" written on a poster-board.  I can still feel the hand of the person I stood next to in that church I had never been to before and never went to after.  I can still remember where in my closet i found my flag that i put in my back window of my car (before the window flag phenomenon was a thing). And the tears, i remember the tears.  The stories, the grief, the inspiring heroism, the magnitude of the devastation.  At that time I had never been to New York, and my love affair with the best city int he world, was still years away. But somehow i still felt like  New York was "mine."   I remember Guiliani's presser. A reporter wanted numbers, he could only say it would be unbearably high.  I remember the president's speech.  The most serious I had seen in my life.  Never before had we felt so vulnerable.  Soon enough the anger would come, but at that moment, just shock and heartbreak.


The years keep changing the world around us, with each year, that day drifts further and further into history. My perspective on it has also evolved. But no matter how time changes us, me, our understanding, I can draw a straight line right back to where I was no that day.  I hope that never changes.

~ kg

A time to heal

It is hard to believe how many years ago it was when I began my tradition of writing about the anniversary of 9/11...or since 9/11 itself.  When the towers fell, my nephew was 1 month away from stealing my heart with his birth, now he is 1 month away from being 12 years old.  Occasionally, I find it interesting to read back through my 9/11 posts sequentially.  When I do, as I had hoped I would, I can see the bread crumbs from the present to that day, in my own journey to healing.  In years passed I've referenced the paralyzing effect of the news footage from that day.  I've relived the sorrow, the anger, the hurt,  the generosity, the fear, the bravery, the unity, the division, mistakes, the triumphs, the politicization, the polarization, the conspiritzation, and the revisionism that have come to encircle this day.  Ive also tried to capture the pulse of the nation...take a snapshot of our psyche...and of my own.   This year, yet again, I find myself taken off guard by 9/11....only this year I can feel, for the first time, a sense of distance.  There's a hint of dismissiveness and minimization, even in myself.  Perhaps it is because over a decade has passed.  Perhaps it is because the current administration does not refer to it as the previous one had.  Perhaps it is because Bin Ladin is dead.  Perhaps it is because we have other things that are worrying us more.  There is a sense, in a general way, that what lies before us may dwarf what lies behind us.  Perhaps these all play a part, but I suspect it is also because, we have been healing all along the way.  The raw emotions are less accessible, the memories a little fuzzier.  We remember, and we mourn, but we do not dwell.

I'm reminded of one of my favorite poems, In Memoriam by Tennyson. When he was in his 20s, he lost his best friend very suddenly, and he wrote the poem In Memoriam over the next 17 years.  He chronicled  the grief process like no one else ever has, touching on the major and minor moments over the years.  Through his words, you can see how different seasons of his grief colored the way that he experienced the difference moments in his life through the years.  Towards the end, he is able to come to terms with his loss and enjoy his life without guilt.  He would always grieve, and always be changed by his loss, but he did not let the past steal the present.

Where we stand now, I can say that I believe my country and my countrymen have been profoundly changed by this event and the aftermath.  We understand the dangers of the world outside of our relative utopia...however it seems as though we have moved beyond the reactionary, fear-based response and into a more reasoned and measured analysis of our place in this world.  We have come a long way in the healing process.



God Bless those who mourn their loved ones tomorrow as they watch the footage, see the images  and hear the sounds of that day.

Where Were You When the Spin Stopped Spinning?

Like some other people I know, I had followed the election with a feverish-cult  like obsession that might lead one to believe I had placed sizable bets in Vegas regarding the outcome...I had not.  What I had done, was hoped for a result that I grew increasingly convinced was not possible. I awoke to a grim reality on Wednesday...not that Romney had lost or Obama had won, but that the ideology that I have most closely identified with was in a terminal decline and perhaps untenable. That was a difficult day.   I've since heard every pundit and faux-pundit (i guess that includes me) on earth spout out about what "republicans need to do".  Sometimes these are Democrat pundits whose thinly veiled agenda is hidden behind their  feign altruistic desire to "help the republican's out" ...these voices should be muted and tuned out immediately.  Then there are the republicans who are ready to become Democrat-light and abandon any policy that has been suggested by the other pundits to be toxic to the party.  I've had my fair share of questions on where I stand. I realized I have already answered this question....I wrote a blog in 2010 on the eve of the wave midterm elections, I spoke about what I think the future of the republican party needs, and in that blog lies what I believe is the solution to a republican party that has a future as a national force. here is the link to that piece, you can read after the "here are my thoughts" part: click here  Many of these issues have been individually addressed as the solution, but I don't think any one of them alone is the answer.

When the spin stopped last week, and it became clear that the people who are the "brightest and best" old guard pundits were dead wrong, we had to face something...the unofficial leaders of this party do not have their finger on the pulse of our country.  Never have I seen such a wide spread epidemic of  misplaced confidence, than I did this election cycle. Does the phrase "the emperor has no clothes" mean anything to you?  This leads me to ask myself....are we now going to listen to their view of what we need to do to move forward?    Perhaps its time to begin to look to new people for solutions, analysis, and most importantly ideas. We cannot continue to recycle talking points that are clearly loosing elections for us.  I went into to Tuesday night hopeful....hopeful that I was wrong. Hopeful that the anxiety that had mounted in me would be washed away in an upset...hopeful that the minority of republican analysts and pollsters would leave leave egg on the face of the majority of those who said that Romney had no chance.  Hopeful but not blind to the reality.  While my fox watching friends thought I was crazy, I knew in my core that a Romney win would be an epic underdog upset.  While the election was a huge blow to me, unlike the upper ranks of the republican party, including Romney himself, I was not blindsided by the loss.  The overall election results did surprise me, the states that were won, some of the ballot measures that passed in certain states...but I was not shocked that Obama was re-elected. I had stated on Facebook a few days before that I thought Obama would win, as I had also predicted in 2008.  Why were the people who are suppose to be the experts so wrong?  One might assume that they were just trying to give republican voters hope, but by all accounts, they were all quite confident in their analyses.  It is clear to me, that we need to move to new, younger, more relevant people to analyze, problem solve, and idea generate for the conservative movement.....the problem is how?  I have ideas, I have analysis, but I have no influence outside of my circle of friends.  How do we change things when we have no voice?

One last thing, if you have despaired since the election, as I did for several days, It's time for us to start to engage in the process of problem solving again.  It is absolutely an uphill battle, but embedded in our psyche is the folklore of the brave, innovative, relentless spirit of the pioneers of this country, and of the generations who have followed.  We can't give up, we aren't the band who played while the titanic sank. I am not.  It's hard to keep going when things seem bleak, and no one had more pessimistic words than I did on Nov 7th, but I was wrong.  I was so wrong.  Don't despair, it was the battle, not the war that we lost.


"We have every right to dream heroic dreams. Those who say that we’re in a time when there are no heroes, they just don’t know where to look."   Ronald Reagan Inaugural Address 1981



peace,
kg

Dear Future American

I am really no one special, just an average citizen with a blog.  I write to you from a complicated time period, but then again, aren't they all?  Lately I have been imagining what it is like for you with your liberty receding, your opportunities shrinking, your taxes rising, and the world growing ever darker.  I wonder if you resent us, the seemingly frivolous generations of Americans that paved the path for you.  If you do, I don't blame you.  Watching it unfold is kind of like to watching someone fall, the illusion of slow motion makes it seem as though you could try to help, but you know in reality you are powerless. 

The momentum is going forward on this bullet train to disaster and i don't see a way to reverse course.  I want you to know that I did what could to educate myself and those around me.  I was willing to sacrifice the comforts of being coddled by the state, and would willingly pay higher taxes if there was a plan for deep spending cuts that would put our country on a sound fiscal course.  It may seem crazy to you, but those people who ring the bell of alarm about the cliff we are going over, are often portrayed as evil, stupid, crazy or all of the above....they are vilified as greedy hoarders who don't care for the poor or the elderly.  Hyperbolic lies that solve nothing.  Sigh.....I'll get to the divisiveness later. 

Some Context: for most of my adult life, we have been a post 9/11 country.  I can only imagine what sort of distorted understanding of 9/11 Hollywood has painted for you, but you should know that 9/11 changed everything.  We awoke to a scary reality....faceless men in button down shirts can kill massive amounts of people with a $300 plane ticket.  Iconic marvels of American industry, architecture, finance, technology and defense can be targeted without a single shot fired in retaliation.  Piles of dead private citizens were the trophy that our enemies most treasured.  You probably had to be there.  I hope to God that you have never been there and the citizens of our country have not had to live through another day like that one.  But if that be the case, the price to secure that has been devastating both in financial treasure and human treasure.  Besides the fallen heroes, the most tragic and damaging loss is the unity of our people.  We live in a divisive time.  Our differences have put lava filled oceans between us.  The ability to solve problems has fallen victim to the partisan antipathy that has defined the last 10 years.  Both parties carry blame for fiscal irresponsibility.  Both.  I hope I'm voting for someone that will finally address the issue, but he's politician, so......

I am not prone to conspiracies, but sometimes I wonder if there is some sort of intent behind the seemingly suicidal deficit spending of the last 10 years.  How can this end well? How can anyone suppose that it will? If me, someone with at best a cursory understanding of economy, can see the dangers of this path, surely the brightest and best can.  Surely the Treasury, the Congress, the Senate and the President can.  Surely.  Right?   These are the things that worry me, that cause me wonder what kind of world you live in and how you must look back on the beautiful gift that my grandparent's (the greatest) generation left for us and how it was squandered away.

I hope I am wrong.  I hope that the country found a way to control the deficit, rebuild the middle class, Pay china off, strengthen the dollar, and secure the blessings that have met Americans during my lifetime, for you and your children.  I hope as you read this, we went to Mars, invented life-changing things, inspired people around the world to democratize, and I hope that you fly around in the latest Ford car powered by a renewable energy source Americans developed.  But if you live in a much different, darker world, I can only say, I'm sorry.  I wish I could have changed it.  


kg

Brietbart

Like many others, I awoke Thursday to the shocking news that Andrew Breitbart had passed away at the age of 43. It seems like there have been a slew of famous deaths lately, Davy Jones died just as suddenly the previous day, and of course there was Whitney Houston who died not that long ago. But for reasons I could not fully process, Breitbart's death has been hard to swallow.

I read many tributes to him, as many as I could find...from friends to frenemies to adversaries, I was pleasantly surprised to find kind words all around. His persona did not lend him to sympathy from the left, but it seems he was able to charm and garner respect form even those who disagreed with him. I'm sure those tactless tweets are in abundance, something Andrew was all too familiar with. Famously when Ted Kennedy died, Andrew tweeted "rest in Chappaquiddick", so I'm quite certain that he would relish the idea of foes making similar remarks at his death. In fact, he would probably love for someone to log into Twitter as him and retweet them.

I've been wondering for the last couple of days since this happened...why does this bother me so much? Yes, I went to bighollywood about 50 times a day, but overall, Andrew was not my brand of politico. His fiery, in your face, warrior spirit is antithetical to the measured, calm, and respectful tone I like to take in political discourse. In truth, I tune into Dennis Prager over Mark Levin, and I prefer Sowell to Coulter. Yes, I will definitely miss his tweets (that man kept hours that even I couldn't compete with). Yes, I know the movement I belong to won't find another one like him anytime soon. Yes, He did things that changed the landscape of media for the better, and yes his courage and boldness is rare (esp on the right). Yes, He didn't care if something was unpopular (even amongst conservatives) he went where his conscience took him and there he stood. Yes I admired his courage and commitment to stand with GOPROUD, despite pushback from some conservatives. But still, I didn't know him, I didn't think about him much, I didn't even particularly care to hear him speak. So why is this nagging me so much?

I thought about it, and thought about it, and thought about it..and what i've determined is...it's not that I will miss him, nor that he is irreplaceable, nor any of the political ramifications of his absence...its that he was 43 years old. He died at 43 years old of seemingly natural causes. He wasn't addicted to propofol, or prescription drugs, or an alcohol (that we know of). He wasn't a race-car driver, or skiing down a mountain playing football, or flying a plane with a broken foot in the dark, or a cancer patient, or speeding down a highway drunk...He was just walking in front of his house. He was here, seemingly healthy & alive, being a friend, a Dad, a husband, a warrior....then he was gone. As a teenager, I knew of people dying in their 40s (my dad in fact did), but as a 33 year old, its a much more disconcerting fact of life. Its impossible for me ponder this and not be acutely aware of the sand sliding down the hourglass for everyone I love and myself. This is terrifying and uncomfortable. Its the bitch-slap of Mortality...right in my face.

There's nothing we can do, us mere mortals, to change our fates...but these times can convince us that life is precious, that we can be better procurers of the time we have...that we can make the most of our days, and live life to the fullest. That is until this becomes a memory far enough away from us that we once again forget the fragility of our existence...at which point another wake-up call begins this cycle again. How can we hold onto this realization that we are temporary residents of this place?


Legacy is something we tend to think of developing at a much later age, but the truth is our legacy is written each day we walk the earth. Today I watched Andrew's CPAC speech from a couple weeks ago. He was disheveled, and looked like he had gained a few pounds, but I found no sign of a man days away from a natural death. What I saw was something I would have missed had I watched it when it aired...It was a man certain of his purpose, certain of who he was, and fearlessly living his convictions. This is his public legacy. The Bigs, Drudge, the media powerhouses he brought down, ACORN, his proteges, that his his professional legacy. His wife, his 4 children, his loyal and heartbroken friends...they are his personal legacy.

What is yours?




Carpe Diem,

~ kg